Friday, May 1st, 2009


Shoes… part 5

The following is a work of fiction.
Pure fiction.
It’s sole purpose is give the reader a chance to try on another guy’s shoes.
Maybe see how a different opinion fits.
Or not
.

 You look out the office window and smile. The smartest decision you and your husband ever made was for you to run for Mayor. Winning that election was a piece of cake. It took little effort and only a few promises to derail your opponent. But it hadn’t gone unnoticed that barely one-fifth of the population had even bothered to vote at all, and that you barely got the majority of those votes. “I’ll do better next time” you remember thinking and now, looking out onto this beautiful snow-covered city, through the window of the Governor’s office – your office – you grinned, thinking “heh, I did just that!”

And if running for Mayor had been the smartest thing you’d done so far, running into The Senator at that State Fair, a while back, was the luckiest. He was a funny old bird and had taken a shine to you right away. He was politically savvy and (for whatever reason) eager to share his road to Washington D.C. with you. Forty years of successful wheeling and dealing inside the US Boys Club. Wow. He’d been a fountain of information and good advice.

The way he could manipulate the media and the public was inspiring, but you were here now. You had arrived. You didn’t want him upstaging you much longer. He was the darling politician of your state, but he was also in some legal hot water over undeclared gratuities. Add that to his age and well, he was more than likely on his way out.

So you’d picked his brain and done the photo ops and followed his wealth of adages (things like play ball with the boys, doll, and ol’ Uncle Sam will always take care of you). But you knew what you wanted now, and how to get it, and you no longer needed this seedy old man hitching his worn-out coattails to your brand-new wagon.

By the middle of your first term in office you’d already decided if the Senator was going to fall, you’d just step aside and let it happen.

Turns out the most important thing about politics, you learned on your own, anyway. In the first grade no less, when that nasty third-grader tried to steal your lunch and you had to sucker punch him to get it back – and then smile at the teacher and say “he musta fell but I’m watchin’ him closer now.”

You just do whatever you need to do, take full credit for things that turn out well and deny everything else. Oh, and smile. Always smile.

That’s pretty much what you’ve done with The Senator already – just kept smiling while he told you how to shortcut this or circumvent that – find Jesus - the public loves it when you tell ‘em you found Jesus. The Senator was sure right about that one. Folks who carry bibles will follow you anywhere if you tell them you have one too. The ones who don’t will get behind your right to say you do, so latching onto religion is always a win-win, politically speaking.

As Mayor, you carefully surrounded yourself with people you could trust. Old friends for whom you could grease the wheel and keep in your debt enough to be sure they would never betray you, because when The Senator first told you no matter how hungry people get, nobody kills the cash cow! it made you laugh. But eventually you caught on and embraced the idea.

And now, as Governor, you could do even more. You could travel all across the country and as long as you gave one little speech somewhere, the taxpayers would be happy to pick up the tab for the whole trip. You could have anything your heart desired, now, and your faithful staffers would find a way to write it all off as state business. The Senator, God Bless him, taught you well.

As you stood there now, looking out onto the snowy landscape, you realized you’d been right from the start. This whole business of winning elections and holding office really wasn’t much different from the inner workings of a small-town beauty pageant. You smile into the camera, occasionally (and quite accidentally) spill fruit punch on a fellow contestants costume and most important – tell the judges the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Even if that means making it all up as you go along.

After all, it’s in everyone’s best interest that you keep winning.

Shoes… part 4

The following is a work of fiction.
Pure fiction.
It’s sole purpose is give the reader a chance to try on another guy’s shoes.
Maybe see how a different opinion fits.
Or not.

August 8, 1974

You’ve taken off your comfortable size 11 penny loafers and slipped into the black dress shoes which had been laid out for you earlier. You lift the suit jacket from the brass valet and sling it over your arm, glancing out the side window one last time. The roses here are always so beautiful. You’re going to miss them.

It’s a particularly hot August this year, but strangely, you can’t feel the temperature. It’s as if your skin knows how inconsequential the weather is today. “They want to impeach me” you say under your breath but loud enough for the gentleman in the dark blue suit to hear.

“Yes sir”.

“In a sense, they’re blaming me for doing my job.”

“Yes sir.”

“They can’t possibly understand how important it was to know what the Democrats were up to back then – to stay one step ahead so my re-election wasn’t derailed. I didn’t just want to be re-elected you know. It wasn’t an ego thing like some are saying. I needed to be re-elected. The people needed me to stay their president. So much left to do. They still need me.”

“Yes sir.”

“They just don’t seem to know it. After all I’ve done for them. China. The draft. Everything. Hell, I even gave them the moon!” You let out a chuckle, but then slowly shake your head. “Still they want to impeach me. It wasn’t supposed to be like this.”

“No sir.”

“It’s not right you know. Whoever leaked the terrible rumour that started this – well it’s just not right. What my men did – that was my business, nobody else’s. They were just helping me find the enemy. Same way you look for termites when you know they’re there, but you just can’t see ‘em.

“Loyal bunch. Damn, they were just protecting me and the country from the enemy. Those lousey dem- well. Well I’m not going to let them impeach me. Today I tell America I’m leaving office and that will be that. Gerry will have to figure out the rest.”

“Yes sir.”

“I’m just so disappointed they couldn’t see what I was trying to do for them. They just couldn’t see. And those two damned reporters – like children fighting over a hole in the ground – just couldn’t leave it alone. Had to keep digging. Prying.”

“Yes sir.”

A knock on the door draws your attention. Another suited gentleman enters and announces “Mr. President, it’s time.”

You look up, pulling the second blue suit into your dialogue. “This is just like sausage-making you know. People don’t want to to be told what goes into sausages they just want to grill them up and eat them.” You slip your arms into your jacket. “Government’s the same way. People don’t really want to know how it works, they just want their taxes low and their mortgages paid and have enough money left over to put their kids through college and gas in their cars.”

You walk toward the door and see the military escort waiting in the hall. You stop to salute. They each salute back. “Mr. President” one of them says, gesturing you to fall into place in front of him. You take another step forward, and then another. The last steps you’ll ever take down this corridor. You’re overcome with sadness.

“Funny thing is, it wasn’t the people doing the asking. Just the reporters,” you say to the blue suit beside you. “Deep throat. Bah. Americans shouldn’t have to know what their President has to go through to protect them from wrong-thinking people. To give them what they need. To keep them safe. They just shouldn’t have to know.”

As you turn the corner, the camera flashes start popping. You put on your best smile, raise your arm and wave to the crowd of reporters. And as you take in the profound image of The White House Rotunda crammed with people, you think righteously to yourself …

“… and that’s the way it should be.”

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