There is a new poll on TOPIX asking it’s readers to not only vote for whom they believe to be Trig Palin’s actual biological mother, but also asks the reasoning behind the vote.

I voted for Sarah Bristol. But my reasoning didn’t fit into the comment box *grins* so I thought I’d post it here;

Please understand my knowledge of Alaska and it’s Governor was nihl to nothing prior to Sarah stepping on the natonal stage last year as the VP candidate on John McCain’s Presidential ticket. Originally, I was behind McCain for the simple reason I had been a Hilary supporter and was gutted when she lost to the Still-Wet-Behind-The-Ears Senator Obama. But Sarah’s campaign of hate and disrespect for her fellow citizens changed everything. I began to campaign for Obama from my perch in Australia, having been won over by his relentless calm and unbounding logic regarding world affairs and economics – and fearful of the consequences a woman like Sarah Palin would proffer holding an executive office.

From the beginning, my gut has steered me away from taking anything Sarah Palin had to say at face value. So far, it’s looking like a pretty accurate instinct. So this is the reasoning behind my vote of ‘Bristol Palin is Trig’s natural mother”

My gut says this is how it all happened:

Bristol and Levi, having only been educated in abstinence and not actual birth control or STD prevention, succumb to teenage hormones and Bristol falls pregnant.

But during the first trimester, before Bristol starts showing or a plan can be made, one of her routine ultrasounds shows an abnormality. An amniocentesis is ordered. The baby has Downs Syndrome.

“How can this be? Bristol is too young to have a Downs baby! Only older women have that!”

“Well, no, actually, there are a percentage of young women who give birth to Downs babies every year. Statistically, it’s around .6%. That’s six out of every thousand pregnancies. There are actual support groups for young mothers Bristol’s age with Downs babies. I can give you a few numbers…”

But Sarah’s not thinking about support groups. The light in her brain has switched to the [on] position and a plan is hatched. Mom Sarah, realizing how other people would also associate a Downs baby with a late-in-life pregnancy, figures if she steps up and claims the baby is hers, no one would question it. She could avoid a scandal (teenage unwed mother and all that) and this pregnancy would not interfere with her political agenda. She’d only been Governor for a couple of months. This was not the time to test the public waters.

As soon as Bristol’s bump could no longer be hidden under a bulky sweatshirt, she’s pulled out of school and whisked away under the guise of having a case of mononucleosis so severe she requires complete bedrest, sans visitors. Sarah will wait until the very last minute to divulge her secret pregnancy.

After all, it’s also possible that the pregnancy would terminate itself. The doctor said there was a small but not uncommon chance that nature could intervene causing Bristol to miscarry. So she wouldn’t rush to tell people right away. She’d wait until at least the end of the second trimester.

In early March, Sarah begins wearing loose-fitting clothing. It was, after all, just faking a pregnancy. Not rocket science.

But Sarah’s impatient nature doesn’t have her slowing down. She maintains a busy schedule and keeps her eye on the political prize which lies ahead. She makes and keeps all speaking engagements. She adjusts the size of her belly, first with a simple band, then with the same fake bellies used by actresses to show the progressive phases of natural pregnancies. Which was heaps better because the band kept slipping, and she kept needing to explain why she wore her big coats indoors.

She would attribute the lack of swollen ankles and no increase in body fat to a healthy diet and good exercise. She could be pregnant and still do whatever she wanted to do. She would be the epitome of the modern woman.

Bristol going into labour while Sarah was out of state giving a speech tossed a monkey wrench into the mix, but it was still doable. The doctor had also explained that Bristol, being a first time mom would probably have a long labour. Sarah would have plenty of time to give her speech, get on the first plane out of Texas and with Todd at her side, get back to Wasilla before anyone was the wiser. She would make it home in time to say she’d comfortably delivered her baby, in her own state, by her own doctor.

As it was, Bristol didn’t deliver for several hours after she and Todd checked into the hospital. It was all good. They’d get through this politically unscathed.

The rumours of her being on the short list for the VP nomination turned out to be true. Senator McCain sent his scouts to meet with her. She assured them she was up to the task. Everything was going well.

The thing about not properly educating your children about sex, pregnancies and venereal diseases, is they are left to fumble around on their own. The old joke about the Catholic woman thinking ‘the rhythm method’ meant only having sex every Thursday night, isn’t so funny when you realize how many young women are left in the dark about how pregnancies actually happen.

I know, personally, a young woman who, at the age of 15, succumbed to having sex with her 2-year long boyfriend. She contracted herpes on their first intimate encounter. She was horrified. She looked me straight in the eye and said “but I don’t understand! I took a bath right after!”

A very common misnomer is that a woman cannot conceive directly after delivery. That while you are nursing, or bleeding from the delivery, you are safe to have unprotected sex. How appealing that must sound to many young people. Unprotected sex without consequences. No cumbersome rubber! Cool..

Enter baby Trip. And this time, Sarah can’t cover for her child. “Oh well, since we can’t hide her, we’ll just trot her out on the national stage as the pinup girl for abstinence-is-best and make some money off her speaking engagements. Bristol! You now believe in abstinence! Put down that basket of laundry and start writing your speeches!”

Well, that’s my story, and until someone from Wasilla who actually knows the truth, takes some responsibility and drags it out of the shadows and into the light of day, I’m sticking by it.

Hattip to The Immoral Minority  (link is just over there >>) for the poll at Topix.

EDIT:  Fixed stats number above. Correct stat is .6% (6/1000) rather than 6% as first posted. Thank you,  ENOUGHwiththetrainwreck,  for catching this error. (I should never try to work with numbers after midnight!)