My new computer system is magnificent. Seagate. 250 gigs of real estate and 4 gigs of memory makes quite a playground. I can make non-fuzzy .mpg files out of my photos, use Word 2007, harvest my crops on Farmville, chat on Facebook and open emails all at the same time with no hiccups or lag. It’s geek heaven.
So this arvo I’m out and about shopping for a backup drive. The last time I had a backup drive it was called sneaker net. Sneaker net was the technical term used to describe loading all one’s work onto as many 3″ floppy disks as necessary and walking them across the room to either another computer or the filing cabinet. Today you get this little thing that looks like either a short, fat pen or a very small remote control, stick it into a port on your tower and it beeps when it’s done, just like the microwave oven. One Terrabyte – one-hundred-forty-four dollars. No more disks. God I love technology.
The purchase was swift and painless so as long as we were in civilization, spouse and I wandered around the mall. He drooled over a 24″ monitor. $400. Good grief, we each recalled when the 21″ monitor first hit the market about fifteen years ago at $2000.00 and techies couldn’t shell out the cash fast enough. The Veronica’s have their own line of little girls clothing. Adorable. The stretchpants each come with a plastic bag attached, containing a silver heart on a chain. Chocolate Easter bunnies are everywhere and I’m not even sure where Easter falls on the calendar this year. But I am pretty sure we haven’t done Valentine’s Day yet. So these must be those legendary ‘early bunnies who catch the early worm’. (heh ok, ok sorry!)
And while spouse strolled off to inspect the newest in light bulb tehnology, (he’s finally embraced the whole ‘incandescent bulbs are bad’ concept) I spotted the bookstore and grinned.
Clerk 1: G’day may I help you?
OzMud: Do you by any chance sell the Sarah Palin book?
Clerk 1: Oh I think we do. It’s not out there is it?
OzMud: Nup. I’ve looked through all the front racks, even the one marked 50%off.
Clerk 1: Well let me look it up for you.
The clerk busied herself typing on the register. A second clerk came out of the back room. “The register acting up again, is it?”
Clerk 1: No, I just can’t seem to find Sarah Palin’s book. I thought we had it.
Clerk 2: What’s the actual title?
OzMud: Going Rogue. An American Lie. I mean life, sorry.
Clerk 1 let go of a big, broad grin. Clerk 2 disappeared into the back. I leaned closer and said quietly “You know, I don’t actually want to purchase this book. I’m just very curious as to how many copies you may have sold. I have a blog you see, and my readers and I have been curious about Sarah’s overseas sales.”
Clerk 1 began typing at the register again, her grin even bigger than before.
Clerk 2 reappeared from the back and flopped a hardcover copy of Going Rogue right in front of me. Dust flew off the cover as it landed. I waved the air with my hand, trying not to imagine what horrible disease a person could catch from getting Palin dust up their nose.
Clerk 2: We have a boxful. Full.
Clerk 1: It doesn’t look like any copies have been sold, actually, according to the store’s database.
OzMud: Well, it’s not like she actually wrote it or that anything in it is true.
Clerk 2: That’s $43.95
Clerk 1 and I flinched in unison.
Clerk 2 figured out there was no sale to be made and left for coffee, muttering something gnarly about Americans. I’m not clear if it was directed at me or Sarah or both.
Clerk 1 leaned close to me and whispered “If you wait about 6 months the paperback will be out and the price won’t be quite so dear.”
I leaned in and replied “If you wait about a year, the truth will be out and we won’t have to bother reading it at all.”
They didn’t have a copy of Game Change. I might have sprung $43.95 for that one. So I thanked the helpful clerk and told her I’d be back when they got their supply of Levi’s book. Then I bought a copy of Logic Puzzles by Mensa, The High IQ Society to send to my oldest daughter in the US. Clerk 1 smiled through the entire transaction. In fact, she was still grinning when I walked away. I’m guessing she had the same silly picture in her head as I did of Sarah tryng to solve a Mensa logic puzzle:
*The Land of Zoz
In the land of Zoz, there live three types of person:
-Truthkins, who live in hexagonal houses and always tell the truth
-Fibkins, who live in pentagonal houses and always tell lies
-Switchkins, who live in round houses and who make true whatever they say
One morning 90 of them gather in the city in three groups of 30. One group is all of one type. Another group is made up evenly of two types. The third group evenly comprises three types. Everyone in the first group says “We are all Truthkins”. Everyone in the second group says “We are all Fibkins”. Everyone in the third group says “We are all Switchkins”.
How many sleep in pentagonal houses that night?
ROFL – yuh Sarah g’head – give us the answer to that one
*Excerpt from Logic Puzzles, British Mensa Limited, copyright 1996
To comment on this post, please scroll up to the title The Land of Zoz and click on the word comments just beneath. Thanks, OzMud
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Just so it’s clear to everyone that I did NOT cheat… I got it wrong! rofl (My kid is going to love this book!)